She doesn’t actually exist. That woman, you know her nau. You don’t? Let me tell you a story. 

I was at a small buka waiting for the lady popularly known as nwanyi abacha by her customers to serve me the half plate of rice and stew I ordered some fifteen minutes ago. While I was waiting, a group of three guys came in and ordered for their own food as well. 

While we all waited and silently cursed the slow service in nwanyi abacha’s shop, a very voluptuous Kim Kardashian – ish girl passed by the shop. Trust boys nau, they waited until she was out of sight before they started talking about how she was their dream girl.

“Guy see make I tell you, I no go fit date slim babe because nothing dey there to press. If me and that one wey been pass dey at least pillow go dey to sleep for night” said one of the guys. 

“I swear I like them BIG so that rear view during action go make sense” said another one.

The last statement got me thinking. These guys that were talking were not up to 25 years old. They are the boys that drive girls with shaky self esteems to do crazy things just to be BIG or Busty. 

It is because of people like these guys that slim or thin girls are now the unattractive bunch. It is because of people like them that girls spend their allowance on waist trainers and teas that usually don’t even work.

it is because of these set of human beings that girls wear all sorts of fake things on their body just too look big. Some people develop unhealthy eating habits just to be BIG for the guys. 

You know the funny thing? Think about it, the 25 year old guy that wants a big girlfriend might actually end up marrying a big wife just like he says. When this big wife gets bigger with postpartum fat or stress fat, would he love her still?  

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not hating on the big girls, my best friend is a big girl and I love her. Everybody is beautiful in their own way. My only problem is when these statements made out of ignorance push girls who are also ignorant into changing their bodies because they aren’t proud of it. 

I like it when a girl is in charge if her life and adds weight because she feels it’s good for her or looses weight because she knows it’s good for her still. 

I was having a conversation with someone one day about a friend of ours who was getting obese.  This certain someone made a silly statement that stung me. She said, “ehn there are men who like big girls, besides, her boyfriend likes it like that.”

Ladies please! There is no perfect woman. That perfect woman you want to be for that man, she doesn’t exist. At all.

Don’t push yourself to do things to change yourself for someone who doesn’t like you for who and how you are. Don’t let chauvinist statements get to you and make you feel bad about how you are.

Don’t mask that beautiful body and soul of yours with a low self esteem. Always feel good about yourself everywhere you go.

Don’t let society dictate your skin colour, boob size, ass size, shoe size, fashion sense, accent, or even hairstyle. Do things because you want yourself to do it…for yourself! 

Big or small, skinny or fat, short or tall, you are beautiful. 

Say no to body shaming! 


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